Is it a good idea to give things up when you’re trying to be healthier?
There’s often a view that abstaining from things is bad - and can end up making you crave them more. People are told that if they give up chocolate, or caffeine, or sugar, that they may end up desiring it so much that the urge becomes uncontrollable and they end up gorging on it in huge excess. But, is that true?
I guess my answer is the same one that I would frequently give to new Personal Trainers when I was taking them through their courses and they’d have a question they wanted answering about some aspect of health and fitness…
‘It depends.’
Giving things up - foods, drinks, or other unhealthy habits can be both extremely helpful, and also a very bad idea. Let’s have a look at when it might be good to abstain completely, and when it might not.
Addiction
For people struggling with addictions - to alcohol, cigarettes, drugs, or gambling, giving up can be the only way to break the cycle. They have to adopt a zero tolerance policy, because for any of a number of reasons - some related to their personal circumstances, and others to the way their brain is wired, they are not able to exert any control over that particular habit. They cannot judge sensible levels, and so abstaining completely is the only safe way for them.
Whilst many of us will talk of being addicted to things - coffee, or sugar for example - unless it has exerted a terribly negative influence on our life, then we may not feel that total abstinence is the right choice for us.
Values
The most common example I can give of how values impact health behaviours is that of having children. Instantly, many mothers will go without all sorts of foods and drinks in an effort to ensure that their unborn baby is healthy. And you’ll frequently see both mums and dads packing up smoking completely once they learn they have a child on the way. They may have tried to quit a number of times before but, for some reason, they’ve never managed to make it stick. Until now.
Why? Because they suddenly have something that is vastly more important to them. Now it matters. The same sometimes happens when people are diagnosed with an illness, or a close friend or family member is. It doesn’t always work like this, but it’s still a powerful influencer.
That doesn’t mean that when people try to abstain from things they deem unhealthy, but fail, that they don’t think it’s important. The very fact that they’ve tried to give up means they must see the benefits of doing it to some degree. The challenge often lies in the fact that things aren’t black and white - we can see both benefits and drawbacks in a habit at the same time, and we can get stuck in the middle - giving up, starting again, giving up, relapsing, and so on. Here’s an example:
John wants to give up chocolate. He feels it would help him to have more energy in the long run, and there is a family history of type 2 diabetes, so he’s concerned for his long-term health. But, he works hard and a chocolate bar sometimes gives him a quick boost of energy when he needs it. He also loves the taste, and he sometimes has some chocolate in the evening as a reward after a hard day at work in a demanding job.
It’s easy to see here how John might decide to give up, but then slip back into old habits because he feels that chocolate gives him some important things.
Swaps
For people like John, a swap is often the best option, to ensure that he gets the benefits of giving up, whilst finding a healthier way to retain the benefits of the chocolate bar. Here’s how he might do it:
Discover other ways to increase his energy levels during the day - maybe swapping chocolate for a quick 5-minute walk outside. Or he might choose to drink some water, or have a piece of fruit, or do some meditation, or have a cup of tea. T
He might also make a list of things he really loves the taste of that he feels are healthier - natural yoghurt with raspberries, maybe even a simple swap to darker chocolate, or a homemade healthy energy bar.
It doesn’t have to be like for like i.e. food for food - just something that gives you the same feelings/benefits/rewards. The choices are endless, and it’s up to John to choose what’s best for him to feel like he’s moving in the right direction towards better health.
The swap is such a powerful choice because you’re still getting the thing you ultimately desired - energy. comfort, social interaction. I’ve frequently heard the latter as the reason people go out with colleagues for a fag break, or to the pub. If you can find a way to still get what you want, without resorting to the healthy habit, your brain will likely be very satisfied and refrain from trying to tempt you into old ways.
Your mindset
Finally, choosing to abstain or not will depend very much on how you view things. For example, I’ve worked with a number of clients who said they wouldn’t be able to reduce the amount of a certain food. If they were going to have a biscuit, they knew they’d end up eating the entire pack. Some people might choose to take a packet and split it into smaller portions, or share them with a friend. But this person knew they wouldn’t do that - so zero tolerance was the only way for them.
And it can work. In the same way that it works for the smokers and drinkers that we talked about earlier on. With foods, some clients find that they just stop thinking about them when they don’t have them, or sometimes that their taste preferences change completely, and when they do have some, they find it too sweet, or too strong, or just don’t like it anymore.
In summary
Abstinence is a great tool if you feel you have an unhealthy addiction to something. In fact, with addiction, it’s frequently the only option.
For most people, taking the time to work out what they like about the thing they’re trying to give up, and swapping it for something healthier that gives them the same, is a very good idea.
Everyone is different. Don’t be afraid to try giving something up. If you find that you can’t, don’t worry about it - you’ve learned that it’s probably just not the right method for you. Try a swap instead. Whatever happens, keep trying. Remember , there is no failure, only feedback.